Faith, Family & the Hustle: Building a Business Together

TDP Ashley Full Interview

Joshua Wilson: Good day everybody. Welcome to the Deal podcast. Uh, this is gonna be a special episode because one of the founders, the CEO of the, the group, the the originator of the idea has, you know, birthed this. His wife is, uh, gonna be one of our first guest. So, Ms. Ashley, welcome to the show. 

Ashley: Thank you so much. I'm so, um, honored to be here.

Joshua Wilson: Yeah. So why don't you tell us a little bit about who you are? 

Ashley: Um, well, um, my name's Ashley. I'm married to Jude for, I guess 17 years now, and we have, uh, six kids with, uh, one on the way. And, um, I have just, you know, uh, I. Been a stay-at-home mom for a while now. Um, I graduated, uh, from high school, went to LSU, um, finished in math education.

Uh, and so I was the sugar mama actually for a few years while Jude was in law school and MBA school. So I taught high school math, loved it. Um, just loved seeing the light bulb in the kids' eyes when they would learn something and to know that I had a part in, um. You know, making math like, not as scary.

'cause everybody hates math. And I'm like, guys, it's really, really fun. Um, and so anyway, so that was good. And, uh, and then, you know, we, we moved back to Lafayette so that, um, we could be closer to family in hopes that we were going to have a family. And, um, it just, it wasn. Working. It wasn't happening. And, um, it, it took us three years to get pregnant with our first, and that was a huge, huge cross for us.

Um, it was really heart wrenching every month to get those negative results. And so my heart still goes out so much to people who carry that cross. Um, and people would see me with all these kids and, and be like, oh, well, you know, you just don't know my struggle. And, um, I, I very much do and, and have such a heart for that.

So, um. Yeah. So I, I taught for a year when we moved back 'cause I wasn't pregnant yet, and then home. Hello. And, um, had her first. And then surprisingly, uh, you know, 16 months later we had our second. I was like, okay, miracle number two, this is awesome. Um, but at that point I was like, all right, I've, I've always had my dream of wanting to be a stay-at-home mom.

And Jude was in his career, um, and, and doing wonderfully and, and was able to support us. So I got to stay home and it was. My dream. Um, and that was wonderful and, and I enjoyed it. Um, it was hard 'cause you're hidden and you're at home and it can be really monotonous and a lot of crying and a lot of diapers and, um, snacks and you know, all the things.

But, um, you find your rhythm. Um. But, but it was still very lonely. Um, we would attend church every Sunday, but it was like, you go and then you leave. And, and there wasn't really, um, enough sense of community to really know people. And, um, and so I got to a point where I was like, you know what? I, I can, I, I need people.

Um, so I, I went to our passenger. I'm like, I wanna start a mom's group. And, uh, it's like. Okay. Um, so I get up at, at church and I give this speech six different times. And, and woman after woman would come after up to me after, and they were signing up and they were, they were interested and, um, and so it was like, wow, this is a need.

And, um, and so it gave me purpose, I guess, a little bit outside of, of my home, even though I didn't have a job. It was something that I felt. I could use my gifts 'cause, because that's, um, a struggle. I think a lot of times with stay-at-home moms, um, they, they feel like they're maybe, you know, they had this, this big career maybe before they had kids and then they, they put that on the, the back burner because they wanna be home with their family and it's so beautiful and, and important in those formative years.

But then. They kind of feel like they lose themselves a little bit in their identity. Um, and so it was nice to have like a little, a little side project, something to, to jazz me up, um, and have just for me. Um, and then, you know, we had a few more kids. God blessed us and that was awesome. But then I didn't have enough time to devote to it.

I was holding it back. Um, and so that was a struggle because it was like, but it's my baby. You know, it's, it's not my physical baby, but it's like my baby. I don't wanna let it go. Um. But I knew I, I was bringing it down. It wasn't. It wasn't fruitful anymore. Um, and so I had to kind of make the tough decision to pray about it, ask God, and, um, realize there was someone else that could, could help and could take it over.

And I mean, boy did she run with it, you know, she took it. She, she revitalized the things that I had already done. I was always passionate about Bible study. I had never let that die. And so I continued on in that regard. Still help coordinate in Bible study. But the other facets of it, you know, these, these formation nights, um, you know, talks and retreats and different things.

She was doing all that, that, um, that I just didn't have the capacity for. Um, and that brought me a lot of joy, but it was also really hard because. She maybe did things a little bit differently than I did. And you know, I had designed my logo and my, you know, like sunflowers and it was just all pretty and pink and she kind of took it in a whole different direction and, you know, the different color scheme and different whatever.

And it was like, oh, okay. And she didn't ask me first, and so it was like, well. Should she have asked me, but it's not really mine anymore. And, and it was hard. It was hard navigating that. Um, so I had to kind of distance myself at one point, you know, and, and say, okay, I, I've gotta, I've given this up, I'm gonna give it to the Lord.

And, and, and that's where it is. Um, and so, so that was good. Um, but then. I got a little restless again, kind of losing like, what, what, you know, where, where am I? What I'm not using my gifts to their full ability, or I felt like I wasn't using my gifts, just being a mom wasn't enough. And that sounded terrible to even admit, right?

Like I didn't wanna even say those words out loud. Um, and so. I kept praying about it, like, Lord, what do you, what do you want for me to do? Um, and at one point I thought it was, I, I wanna go back and get my master's in theology. Um, you know, and, and I don't even know what I wanna use it for, but, you know, uh, as a Bible study leader it's helpful.

But, um, it's always been obviously interesting, very passionate about my faith. So, um, I thought that was what it was. And I worked with my spiritual director. About that. And, and she was like, you know, I, uh, I'm, I want you to learn about discernment itself. I want you to take a whole month. I want you to read this book, and I want you to just learn about the process of discernment before you even discern something.

And um, and I was like. Okay, cool. I'm gonna read a book and, um, you know, 30 notebook pages later, right. Of notes. Yeah. Um, and, and listening to other people's podcasts and reading articles and all the things, I'm like, okay, I think I know what to do now. I'm ready. But yet it was this resistance. I, I just couldn't bring myself to pray about it, to start the process.

And I'm like, what is this? This is so strange. And then, you know, fast forward. Like a month and the. My kids for Christmas. Kind of the backstory a little bit on this part of the story is that back in November I attended a, a women's conference and um, there were all these vendors and you know, they had great stuff, whatever.

Um, a friend of mine, Heidi had told me about this company and she had mentioned it before and I just hadn't really paid attention. And she was like, oh yeah, you know, she has a booth, you should go check it out. So I go look, and she has these, um, Jill. The founder had these truth bands and there are these elastic bands and they have a design on one side, and then they have, um, you know, a truth, um, a declaration, a scripture on the other side.

And they had kids size. And I was like, oh man. And they, and they were like, really affordable. And I was like, these would be great. And my kids stalking. So I got three for the older three 'cause they're the ones that can read and, um, put 'em in their stockings. And our oldest son was 11 at the time. Uh, Jude's asking, Hey, what's, you know, like your favorite.

Gift of Christmas, and he's like, my band, like, you know that band, you know, that I got, that's my favorite part. And we're like, like, it wasn't those like LED lights or like the, you know, this thing over here that you were so jazzed about on your Christmas list and no, that that was his favorite thing. And I was like.

Thank you. I'm like, oh, maybe doing something right that my kid loved his band, that loved truth. Yeah. Brought him to Jesus, you know. So, anyway, so, you know, go ahead a little bit. We're, we're doing chores with our kids and, um, my oldest daughter, uh, she's now gonna be 11, she's 10 now. At the time she was like, uh, earning all her money.

She doesn't spend money at all. And so she's the saver and she, um. Decided that she wanted to spend some of her money on more of these bands, these truth bands. And so she's like, mom, can we go on the website to like see if I can, you know, find one that I like that I can get? And I was like, okay, yeah, I think this is like this great use of your money.

You know? So, uh, so we go on there and, and I see on the webpage, like on the, the homepage, pink Salt Riot is permanently closing, and I'm like. No. Like what, what is even happening? Like this can't be possible. Like, like it just, it was shocking. And, and I know exactly where we were. It was in the kitchen Friday morning, um, February 14th, you know, it's Valentine's Day and the kids are about to walk out the door, G's gonna bring them to to school.

And we're like, just can't even imagine. So Jill has this video below and she's just speaking from the heart about. Why this is happening and how the Lord called her to do some other ministry and she can't do both, and no one came along and to, to take this over and she didn't feel right giving it to people that just wanted it for money.

They, she wanted someone that was mission driven and so she was closing it down and Jude hears this and from the other room, he's like, well, maybe you should buy it. I'm like. Shut your face, like your banana pants. Crazy.

You see those six kids over there? Like, yeah, those are yours too. Like, you think I have time for that? Like, right. Um, and so I really just kind of put it from my mind 'cause I'm like, there is no way that this is something that I should even be entertaining. Um, but it's funny, like over the course of the weekend it was like.

Holy Spirit nudge one after the other. Like different things, not even the same thing. It was just like little things that, gimme an example. Um, my friend Heidi, so I even, um, told her because I was like, I mean, it's kind of crazy. Maybe I should throw, I'm gonna throw it at her and see what she says. 'cause I'm like, it's obviously so crazy.

Like she's gonna see, say like, that's dumb. And so I text her, I'm like, Hey, you know. What do you think? I'm like, do you think she would be interested in selling? Like, I just, I, I mean, this is nuts. Like, I don't even wanna, I don't wanna take over the whole thing, like just the truth bands. That's what I care about.

And, um, she's like, I mean, I can reach out, you know, whatever, because Jill's personal assistant lives in Lafayette. She works remotely. Jill is in Tulsa, Oklahoma. So, you know, there's this connection. So she texts her whatever, um, and I don't hear for, for a while. So I can put it from my mind. And then. Later I'm sitting in my bed working on my Bible study and I get a text from Heidi and she's like, Hey, are you still interested?

Because Jill wants to have a call. And I'm like, holy Spirit, are you like telling me something? Um, and I was like, yes. Yes. Holy Spirit, Mary moment. Let's go. Let's, yes. And so we, um, we set up the call. Of course Jude's on it with me because this is what he does for a living. Yeah. He's very good at it. Yeah.

And so I'm like, I'm not gonna know any of this business lingo. I'm a stay at home mom. I know nothing about business. I don't know anything about Canva. I don't know anything about Instagram. I had an Instagram that still has a picture. You can go and look at my, if you know my personal Instagram, it is two.

Two kids. It was my two kids. Like I just recently changed it because it was me and Jude and two kids, because I never got on it. I was on Facebook. All I could handle was one platform, right. Um, and so I had to learn all these things and, um, and so I figured like I, I need some guidance, I need some help. Um, somebody's gonna know more about this than me.

Um, and this is crazy. So we get on the call, we're talking to her, and she's actually surprisingly open to it. Um, she doesn't know me for Adam, you know, but like clearly the Lord had prepared her heart to be watching. She told us that she had been praying about it, and it had kind of been revealed to her that the truth bands weren't done.

The business wasn't supposed to die, but it wasn't for her. And so she kept waiting and waiting and waiting. Like, Hey, like, are you gonna bring the person? Like, where are they? And um, and so I told her, um, sorry, I'm here now. Like, I know what it's like to be on the side of waiting on God waiting and waiting and waiting.

And being like, I'm being ob obedient. I'm praying, I'm asking for your help. I'm trying to be patient. What, what's happening? Um, and I've always kind of, you know, had the mentality that God is not a God of rush. Um, and so this whole idea that we have a call with her on Thursday, and basically by the next week we had said, yes, it's a done deal.

We're gonna sign papers. Go, which by the way, that is not typical people. Um, you know, deals don't usually happen that fast. Um, but what was happening with her business was that she was shutting everything down. This was February 14th. I found out about this March 1st. She was gonna be like flash selling everything.

So she had to halt her sale prematurely very quickly or. All of our inventory was gonna be liquidated, and I'd have nothing left to even buy. And so the business, you know, was like, what's the point? You know, if there's nothing left. Um, and so we had to kind of move quickly and I was like, Lord, you don't, you don't work in a rush.

And I, I talked to one of our, my pastor friends and I was like, but Ashley, what if you looked at it as the Holy Spirit? You know, or God has put all these things in place. You just weren't privy to seeing it yet. You weren't supposed to be there and see it until this moment. This was your moment. And so when I said to Jill, um, I'm sorry that you had to be on the waiting end of this and like the, the like, Hey Jesus, where you know what's happening.

Yeah. I get to just swoop and be like, hi, I'm here. You know? Um, so. Yeah, it's, uh, it's, it's been interesting. And so there was a whole period of, uh, different instances where I, between when we first talked to her and had to make a decision that I needed to go to church for different reasons. Mm-hmm. Um, just unrelated, like my kid got, you know, got an award.

Uh, my got, y'all got an award at school. Um, my son was singing in the service. Um. My husband and I actually had a, a marriage retreat planned the Saturday and then of course Sunday. Sunday. So we always go to church. And so it was five days in a row that I was being called to go and pray and be intentional and listen to the Lord.

And so I'm like, this is not a coincidence. I'm a mom of six kids. Like I don't go to church five days in a week. It just doesn't happen. I'm too busy. Um, and so it was just really interesting. To see how that worked out. Um, and the funny story of, of this, during the marriage retreat, I'm having my private counselor, you know, counseling like spiritual direction with, with the pastor friend and he's known us for year years.

We're in a small group together. And um, I'm like, I mean like, how am I supposed to know if I'm supposed to do this? This is a huge thing, you know? Right. It's a huge decision for me and like we have to make it fast and, um. He said, well, how does God speak to you and, um, speak to me? I said, okay. Um, well, he speaks to me through, um, you know, through adoration when I go and, and I pray before the Blessed Sacrament and I journal.

Um, he speaks to me through my, my prayer journal and he also speaks to me through other Holy men and women in my life that are well-formed and. Respect, you know, that are a little bit farther along in the journey. And he said, okay, good. That's, that's good advice. Do that. And um, and he said, you know, for me, a lot of times, um, God doesn't tell me yes.

He tells me, hell no. So look for the hell no. Mm-hmm. Look for the closed doors. Look for the, the places where he's saying. No, either it's not for you or it's not the right time. And so I'm like, okay, I think I can do that. And so I really went to the Lord and gave him every, like all the things I could think of, all the objections that I could think of.

And every time I would kind of be like, oh yeah. Oh, what about that? He would always bring up, but, but what about this like. This could be a way around that, or this could be a way that I provide, um, you know, you, you're blessed to have, you know, help with the kids. Mm-hmm. So you could carve out a little bit of time.

Your, all of your, your kids are gonna be at, you know, in school enough time that you could take a little bit of that time to use for business. Um, you have a heart for bringing people to the Lord. Like this can be your avenue for that. Um. This can be your way to, to, to reach more souls. Um, the, you know, my oldest son really loves technology and that's a, a, a real struggle to figure out how to navigate that because you wanna protect them.

You wanna make sure that they're not accessing things they're not supposed to or, or being, you know, um, their innocence is tripped away. You don't want that. And so it was like, how can I, you know, use this? And I was like, well, maybe I could help him learn how to use. Social media to bring people to Jesus, you know, like use my business to help him learn and, and formulate th content that is, that is praising God, you know?

Um, and so I thought that was something cool. Um, my, my son, uh, loves to draw. He likes, makes all these Lego creations and, um. He wanted to like, help design truth bands. And, um, and so actually one of the truth bands that we released that has lions on it, and it has crosses and lions, it's, it's in memory of one of my friend's sons who passed away, um, when he was very young, um, who's nine months old.

And, um, and the, the inspiration from that was Caleb's drawing about courage and being brave. Um, and, and so the lion in that. And so it's just interesting how that panned out. Um. My daughter, like loves, you know, jewelry and jewelry making kits and things. So like she comes to the office and she helps me make jewelry, you know, and it's just all these different things that was like, but what about this?

But what about this? And it was, but you could do this and you could, you know, taking time away from your children really wasn't away from your children because they can. Work with you and look at these life lessons that you're teaching them, the, the entrepreneurship, the, you know, tough decisions on, on business and, and what it looks like prudence in spending, uh, versus saving, um, you know, I'm still trying to learn cash flow, people like, you know, like it's just all these things.

That's why I have my husband to help me. But, um, it's, it's different things. Uh, and, and, and so I'm like, the entire time I've thought about. This is successful in any way. It's all the Lord, because I don't know what I'm doing. Like I'm showing up. I'm trying my best, I'm doing my best to do the research, to watch the things, to watch the videos, to listen to the podcast, to like learn things.

But at the end of the day, if I have any kind of success, it's all him because. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know anything. I don't know anything. And of course, everybody's like, DMing me, I, I can help you with that. And I'm like, mm-hmm. Well, thank you, but I have no money, so I can't hire you. You know, like, I wish I did.

Um, you know, and, and that's something beautiful too with, uh, with Jude because, you know, he, he's very successful. Um, and, you know, fortunately, uh, for, for us as a family, so this gets to be something that, um. We don't have to feed our family on. And that gives me a lot of freedom, and I appreciate that a lot, um, to be able to not have to maybe make compromises a little bit in, in decisions, um, and, and everything.

Um, but he also, he doesn't just give me money to like fix the problems. He is, he, he puts me on my own two feet and says, okay, well do you have money for that? No. Okay, well then you can't get it. You gotta go hit the payment, you know, like pound the payment. Drum up those wholesale clients so that you can get this many orders per month so that now you're gonna have the revenue in to be able to hire another person to do this and that.

Um, you know, when I have the crazy wild brain ideas of, um, you know, I wanna do this other product line or whatever, um, 'cause I'm a DHD and I, I am very creative and, you know, sometimes have these like, fun, you know, it's, it's great. You think outside of the box. It's one of the, unfortunately for me. I feel like one of the one pros of, of being a DHD, but, um, you, you tend to have be creative and it's like, oh, you have this product idea or whatever, and it's like, okay, well how much money, you know, is that gonna cost?

And, and you know, what's the reality that people actually want it? Does the market want that? You know? Um, and so thinking through all those things, um. Are you gonna be manufacturing? Are you gonna have a manufacturer? Um, relationships with manufacturers and time difference in relating with manufacturers.

That's, that's always fun. Um. Communicating and, and making sure. And then when, when something comes in and it's not what you intended, you know, how do you deal with that? Um, so I mean, I'm, I'm navigating, I had to, I had to learn how to do taxes, you know, file, file, state, you know, sales tax and just all the things.

So do you think that if you had, so your, your mentor. Spiritual leader said, you should probably spend some time learning discernment. Right? Yeah. So like, there's a process of discernment and it, and it seemed as though, you know, you, you got, you wrote notebooks of notebooks of notes on discernment. Yeah.

What are some of the things you'd learned from that, that period of time, and then maybe do you think that was helpful in what you're experiencing now in the business world? Because you've, you've trans, uh, you've transcended many different identity, right? Roles. I, you know, I dreamed to be a stay at home mom, a wife, maybe be a math teacher, maybe do this maybe so like you have.

You have successfully navigated many different avenues. 

Joshua Wilson: So going back to that discernment, the, the process of discernment, what are some of the key points that you learned there that you're applying in your other areas? Yeah, um, 

Ashley: I mean, I think it all starts with, you know, my identity being rooted in being a daughter of God and that first, because if you don't have that first, that you're a child of God, beloved, accepted.

Just as you are. Now, that doesn't mean Jesus wants you to stay there, you know, in our sin or in our struggles. He loves us too much to leave us there. He wants us to, to try to, to be better, to grow in love and charity and, and goodness towards others and, and ourselves. But even if we fall again, the same thing, um, snap at the kids again or do this again.

He's like, Hey girl, I got you. It's okay. I love you. Let's, let's just get up. Let's, let's do it again. You know, let's keep going. Um, and so things that I learned about the discernment process, um, was

you, you have to, I mean, there's definitely the very secular base level of pros and cons, right? 

Mm-hmm. Um, but there's also a, an element of you dream about what, or reflect, meditate on what your life would look like in five years, 10 years, if you made the decision this way or made the decision that way.

What does that look like and what feelings does that evoke? Do you have a feeling of peace, um, of. Basically overwhelming piece, like just an underlying piece? Or do you have, um, like a, a turmoil, like a, an uneasiness, an unrest in, in your heart about what that looks like? Um, another is, you know, pretend that you're giving advice to somebody 20 years younger than you.

You know, you've, you've lived your life. You're, you know, 80 something and you know they're, they're asking you for advice. What would you tell 'em? Um. But overall, I think throughout the entire process, it's a lot about it. It was rooted in Ignatian spirituality, but which is, you know, hey, uh, uh, you know, the Jesuits have some cool stuff.

Um, and, uh, anyway, I, I like that, that, um. All Christianity has different flavors, you know? So even with, in the Catholic world, there's different flavors and uh, and I think it's, it's what makes this fun. You know, you've got charismatic, you got Marian, you got benedicta, you, you got all these different flavors.

So, um, anyway, so this particular flavor is, is all about like movements of the spirit as far as like, do you have this inner peace about this decision or do you have like unrest and, and disquiet of the soul? Um. That's kind of what, what guided a lot of my decision making process mm-hmm. Um, was when I reflected on certain things.

Did it cause that, did it bring peace? When I, when I ran it all the way to the end, did it bring peace or did it bring dis quiett? Yeah, I think that a lot of times I'm an entrepreneur through and through visionary and, uh, had many, many failures in my, in my journey as a deal maker and, and, and coming along this, this path.

Um, you, you talk about kind of playing it out, you talk about bringing in mentors, advisors, you talk about, you know, even discussing with your husband, you know, so you're, you're really. Gaining discernment from, you know, you read the, the word. Mm-hmm. And then you're, you're gaining feedback loops from, from other people.

Uh, one thing that you said that I think is interesting for a deal maker is as you play this out, 10, 20, 30 years into the future both ways, what did you, what do you feel, what kind of emotions come up? Peace of restlessness. Now, if we rewind your story a little bit, you know, you were, you're living your dream.

Yeah. You were a stay at home mom. You were living the dream that you wanted to pursue, yet you felt restless, so restlessness could even push you in the right direction. Mm-hmm. Right? Mm-hmm. So in peace and restlessness, like this internal peace or in internal restlessness mm-hmm. Let's just say they're both could be good.

Mm-hmm. Okay. And let's just say they could, they could both be bad if you lack peace or, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Or maybe you're just comfortable and you have no restlessness to mm-hmm. To go. Mm-hmm. What ways would you maybe encourage others to maybe use that maybe as a compass? Mm-hmm. For peace and restlessness to maybe guide decision.

Yeah. Um, I, I see what you're saying too. Yeah. Because if you're just kind of complacent and not really not feeling like you're, you're using your gifts, um, you know. That can be a piece and a restlessness, you know? Right. Um, it depends on, on if you let it bother you or not, I guess. Or, or where it, maybe it gets to a breaking point or something.

Um, sorry, can you repeat the question? Yeah, no problem. So I'll, I'll, I'll paint this story. So I, I know someone who is extremely talented in music, very artistic. Brilliant. Like, brilliant, right. Uh, and one of the feedback they received. Was that, you know, that they missed a chord or something like that. And it's probably not accurate.

Like the person giving the the feedback didn't know how to play any instrument. Right. But that happens sometimes. The loudest critics are, are sometimes the, the worst performers. Mm-hmm. The person who I'm describing stopped playing music. Oh, that's so disheartening. So it, it is. Right. So like this internal restlessness sometimes comes from a, a bad.

Source. Right. And it caused lack of peace and he stopped playing music. Yeah, right. So restlessness, you know, or, you know, that could, could come from a bad, bad source. So I guess as you play out, you know that, that future, and you, you had the emotion and you were weighing, do I buy this business or not? What, 

Joshua Wilson: what, what did you see if you didn't buy the business?

Let's just say your discernment kicked in and you're like, I shouldn't do this. Like, and you played it out 20 years. What would you look back and say, I should've, or I could've, or what did you miss? 

Ashley: I, I think so. I think I, I would've, um, I feel like the Lord teaches me so many things through my business as far as like, well, one, humility for sure.

I mean, when you don't know what you're doing and every day you're like. Oh shoot. I messed that up. I like, I did a product launch and the website wouldn't work. And it was like, are you kidding me? I spent like, I even did the work to like promote it on Instagram days. Ed Breadcrumb did. I did what they say you're supposed to do.

Yeah. And then the link doesn't work and I'm like, gotta be kidding me. Sadly, you know, like I, I missed out on a morning of our vacation because I had planned it, the launch on a day that we were gonna be on vacation. Of course. Right, right. Because I, I didn't think that through so well, but it was September 1st, so that seemed like the best time, you know.

Um, and I missed out on a morning of, of time with my kids on vacation because I was on the computer with tech support. Hmm. And looking back, like all I could think about was, I've gotta get this launched because, you know, whatever. And, and Jude was, I mean, love this man, you know, he's brilliant. And so he's like, let, and so kind and gentle with me and correction, right?

And so he's like, well, could we think back on this a little bit? And um, maybe. Launching on our vacation day might not have been the, the right choice, you know? And I'm like, yeah, but it really worked. Da, da, da. Okay. Then if that's really, you know, the answer, then if you hit it outta the park and all these people wanted to get your, what would that have looked like?

What would've success looked like for this particular product launch? Oh wow. And um, and I said, I don't know, like 20. Subscribers, you know, whatever. 'cause we're kind of small still, you know, we're getting out there. I don't run any ads or anything like that, you know. And so, um, he's like, 20, are you sure?

You know, I was like, okay, maybe five to 10. Yeah. And, um, and, and he's like, okay, so let's say five to 10 people were maybe going to buy this today. You know, that first. Don't you think if they had learned about it, knew about it, were invested to go on the day it launched, don't you think they probably would've gone back to the website and tried again if it didn't work and you lost out on these hours of vacation time with our kids because you thought that that was more important and it was just a, a gut check of like, right.

Yeah. Jesus is still trying to teach me stuff about. Ordering my priorities and aligning like what? What is my number one vocation in life? And that's being a wife and mother and getting my kids to heaven. Like that's the number one. And every decision I make needs to be. Around that. Yeah. And putting that first.

Um, and it's hard sometimes 'cause man, that business is flashy. It's fun. It's something for me. I don't have to hear Mommy, mommy, mommy. You know? Um, like I get jazzed up every time an order comes through. I get the alert on my phone. I am doing a happy dance. I am so excited. It is just like, and I'm like, I wonder what they ordered.

Like this could be so fun. And like I go and look and it's like, oh, this particular message, you know, we have all kinds of messages. We have these, these, um, you know, five core truths that we, that we make all of our products around. And so it's like what spoke to them today? Like what were they struggling with, you know, that they needed to hear.

The Lord through this product. And so, and then half the time I'm going pull it off the shelf and I'm like, oh, Jesus is talking to me today. Like this is so what I needed to hear. And so like. Customers are ministering to me as much as I feel like I may be ministering to them and everything is packaged with care.

We hand write every note. I feel like there's so much like personal touch that is lost in the world today, and so it's super critical to me. I write, um, any new vendor we get through, through our wholesale. I have a handwritten note, you know, incursive, so sorry, all those, you know. Young youngins that can't read cursive too bad.

Um, you know, and, and it's just because it's what it's about. Like, you know, we're, we're human, we're all, um, we need that connection. You know, we need to be valued. We need to be seen as an individual, just like God sees each of us as that unique unrepeatable creation. Yeah. All right. I've got one more thing.

So part of the reason we believe in this media platform is to. Educate for sure, right? We wanna educate other deal makers as we learn. We want to teach and we learn a lot from this. So like, it's such a, a give, give kind of platform and this is why we love, you know, media and this and these kind of things.

But another thing we love about this is the inspiration that we get from our guests, but we know that the audience gets from our guests as well. And, uh, because we've developed a, a few different audiences. One of the, we, we hear stories. And we hear questions. One of the, the people I have in mind is a, a woman, uh, who, you know, raised her kids and now she's thinking about starting an arts business.

Mm-hmm. And she's overwhelmed with, do I need to create an LLC? Do I need to do this? How do I do taxes? How do I, you know, set up the online thing? How do I balance, how do I do cash flow? 

And it's, it's so overwhelming that there's almost like this like. Analysis paralysis motion. Yeah. Right. So maybe what, what inspiration would you have for that woman in our audience?

I think it would be, if the Lord calls you to it, he's gonna make a way. Um. You know, I'm guilty of actually kind of feel like I got the cheat code a little bit because my business was established. It was, you know, it was 10 years old and I was able to kind of step into something that was already created.

Mm-hmm. So I, I got a lot of that, um, built in. So unfortunately I can't really help with that part for her. But like, you know, there are so many things that. You know, free resources that you can go and access, I mean, YouTube and, and podcasts. Mm-hmm. And like, I'm, I'm listening to a podcast on Instagram strategy right now.

And, um, just different, um, different things and then reaching out to, to people that you know, um, and just friends to like tell them that you're interested in something. And it's amazing how they'll be like, oh yeah, I know about that. I'd love to like help you, you know? Mm-hmm. Get off the ground. So, uh, you know, my hairdresser's daughter.

It does marketing now, her plate's too full at her current job to help me, but I asked her, Hey, can you meet me on a Saturday? 

And just like, chat over about this? Yeah. And give me any kind of like feedback that you have. She's a 20 something, you know, knows some things. And uh, I'm like, okay, so like, you know, we hadn't even, you know, we talked all about Instagram, whatever.

I was like, we haven't even broached TikTok yet, you know, and she's telling me this. And, and so it's like, and that was all free and it was. You know, out of the goodness of her heart, you know, and, and by the end she was like, man, I, I really wish I had time to help you because I love what you're doing, but like, I just really, you know, can't, and, and I think that's what it is too.

Finding other people that may have hidden expertise that you don't even realize and, and, and using those people to help you, um, to, to come on board to, um, yeah, you know, to, to fill in the gaps for the things that you don't really know. Well, that's good. So. Where could our, where could our audience learn more about you, about your mission here and, uh, maybe even buy some of your swag.

Buy some of your stuff. Yeah. Oh my gosh. I would love to, to sell you guys any kind of Christian jewelry or gift that you need. Um, we have things for all the ages and, and men, women, kids. Um, it's at pink salt riot.com. Um, we're also on Instagram at Pink Salt Riot. We have a TikTok. Same thing, Facebook, um, they're trying to be all the places.

I think we're all on Pinterest too. Uh, I haven't really gotten into that yet. Yeah. Um, you know, six months in, you gotta, you gotta focus on, on, on getting, uh, getting your foothold on, um, the most important things first maybe and, and the things that are gonna be most profitable. Um, it's hard 'cause things are flashy and you like those.

Projects that look like fun, like, hmm. Decorating my office with wallpaper and pretty flowers, you know, but mm-hmm. Is that gonna bring money in the door? Uh, not exactly. So you gotta, uh, make sure you're, you're, uh, staying in your lane and focus, but, uh, an encouragement of like building relationships too. I know I'm kind of going on a tangent, but, um, even just this week, you know, um, my, a friend that, that has a, a business, um, a Christian store in town.

Him believing in me and, and giving me my first big, huge wholesale order, um, and carrying my products. And then now I'm gonna do a popup on Monday for, for him. And, um, and just reaching out and, and. Developing those relationships, stopping in, asking them what they need, asking, you know, um, your vendors, where are your pain points?

What are, what are the ways that I can help you? You know, they're like, Hey, you know, we really would like this, but can we send you the purchase order and you can tell us what we're low on And, um, you know, you just create a draft order and we'll approve it. Awesome. I'd love to do that for you, you know, because I care about you and we're, you know, you're local.

I can run it down the street and hand deliver it to you. Nobody has to pay shipping, you know, and, and it's just things like that, that's, um, you know, the personal touch really, I feel like makes the difference. I don't know. And for people to have a connection with you and, um, to just know, like, Hey, we all love the Lord.

Let's, let's bring people to Jesus, you know, and, and to live in the truth, and not to be sucked in by like the lies of the culture and the things that are like making us just believe all this garbage about ourselves. And then how does that manifest in your life? Not very good. You're not gonna get very far.

That's why we have all this depression, anxiety in our world these days, and it's so sad. So just need sprinkle more Jesus on people. Very good. Well, what we'll do is we'll put your information in the show notes and we encourage everybody to, you know, go check out what you're working on. And, uh, if anybody would like to contact you, just go to the show notes in on YouTube or on the podcast or on the website, and you'll be able to connect directly to Ashley and, uh.

Joshua Wilson: [00:00:00] So now as a part two to Ashley's interview, and if you guys missed Ashley's interview, encourage you to go back and watch that and listen into that. 'cause there's a lot of dynamics about moving from one dream and evolving into different roles and responsibilities as a part of her journey.

So it's very encouraging, very inspirational. We encourage you to listen to that. But what we thought would be fun in this conversation is we have two deal makers under one roof, husband and wife. Six kids one on the way. And wanted to talk about the dynamics of that and maybe how some of the things that they've learned and sharing with doing, hundreds of deals in mergers and acquisitions and raising.

It feels like maybe a hundred kids sometimes, right? So maybe could you share a little bit about it? But let's start with you, Jude. Why don't you tell us what are some of the things that you've learned from having a another deal maker rise up in the house? 

Jude: Priorities are the biggest thing.

We always need to focus on the Lord being our number one [00:01:00] priority, our family being the next priority. And then business always comes after that, and then everything else comes in last place. And we have a thousand different directions we're being pulled. But if you keep those priorities in line, that's the thing that matters most.

Ev, everybody. Has disagreements in their marriage and differences of opinion and whatever else. Like anything else in marriage, you have to have each other's back when it comes to business. Understand what the other person is going through and be able to support 'em through it.

I know personally for me I come from some decades of deal experience at this point and a lot of business experience, and I'm educated in it as well. I think in terms of. Financial statements. I don't necessarily think in terms of, just the basic how do I wanna sell?

And so I have to put myself in Ashley's shoes sometimes and say look, she didn't come from that background, doesn't have that experience. And I'm gonna say things that are obvious to me and they're not obvious to [00:02:00] her. 'cause the things that are important to me aren't necessarily important to her.

And just like anything else, if you have compassion and empathy and patience you can really do some great stuff together. I know that. My strengths might be her weaknesses, but her strengths are my weaknesses as well. Like she is outgoing and bubbly and fun and just an exciting person to be around.

And I like spreadsheets, so it's a good balance and we can find ways to work really well together. 

Joshua Wilson: Yeah. I we're definitely gonna get you some brownie points in this interview. Yeah we definitely experienced that in, in part one of our conversation. Ashley, when it comes to, moving from, my dream was to be a stay at home mom.

Yeah. To now deal maker buying a business, running a business, learning e-comm, and influencer marketing and wholesaling and there's many different aspects of the vendor relationships when it comes to. Doing that within the house, how would you navigate that if you had to do it, you, let's just say you [00:03:00] built and sold this one and you were to do it again.

How would you navigate that differently? 

Ashley: I think I would be, more respectful to listen to his opinion more maybe. Yeah. You're welcome, honey. He's been there. He's done it. I, like you said, I have no, no schooling in this at all. My school is just YouTube. And and asking Jude that.

Is definitely something that I would be a little bit more open to knowing like, Hey, he's been here, he's done that. He can provide a lot more, clarity and guidance in, in things. And because I think there are definitely times that I'll ask him his opinion about something and then I'll still do what I wanna do, and sometimes it doesn't pan out so well.

And so I'm like if I had just listened, huh. But that can be hard because, rightfully he gets a little burned, he is I don't wanna tell you anything else because, you're not gonna listen anyway. And so sometimes I have to really reassure him like, no, like I genuinely do [00:04:00] not know what to do.

And. Or I have two good options and I'm not sure which way to go. And I really want his input, his buy-in on what path I should go. And so that opens the door for him to then be like, okay, I'll tell you, you know what I think and then I have to have the humility to, to say, okay, I'm gonna listen to what he told me to do.

And trust that we're not really the couple that's, like I told you we don't really do that. I know some people are, but but if it turns out that I did know instead I wouldn't throw that back in his face, it was just like, okay, we made the best decision we could in the moment with the information that we had.

And if it doesn't turn out, that's something I've definitely had to learn about being an entrepreneur that because I'm a perfectionist or like they say, a recovering perfectionist it's hard to. Fail and entrepreneurship is a failure after failure. And you have to be able to have the perseverance to get yourself back up and say, okay, this doesn't define me.

I am going [00:05:00] to just put my big girl panties on and let's roll. Let's do this again. Let's try again. If it didn't work that time, okay, maybe that's not the path I need to go on. Let's try this over here. 

Jude: Yeah that's the difference between successful entrepreneurs and unsuccessful ones. The ability to pivot through failure.

Because no matter what business you start, no matter what business you're running, you're gonna have a lot of failures along the way. And the ability to pivot means everything. And she's been really good at that. She's had a lot of things she's tried and it hasn't worked out. And then it's just, how do we pick ourselves up, dust off and try again?

Joshua Wilson: Yeah. When it comes to being under the same roof, right? Let's just say there's a disagreement or even it's so exciting when you're working on being an entrepreneur and working on a deal or working on a business and then you go sit at the dinner table, right? How is there a time when you talk about priority God, family, then you know the business?

Is it hard to. Turn off that switch or to put it on the shelf? Or do you guys have time for that? Like how do you do that where it [00:06:00] doesn't drive the other person nuts. 

Jude: You have to literally put it on the shelf. You can't bring the phone to the dinner table. Yeah. 'cause if you do, it's there with you.

No. We have a no phones at the dinner table rule. Yeah. Our house. And and it's really important checking work at the door is really important and being able to have those boundaries because. We work to live, we don't live to work. And it can really feel opposite from that sometimes.

And so it's really important to focus on what is it that we're doing this for? What is our priority? We know it's the Lord and then it's our family, and then it's work. And if you approach it from that mindset, you really can check it. What do you think, honey? 

Ashley: I've actually been in awe of you with the way that you have.

Pretty much your whole career been able, like whether it was lawyer, m and a to, to then, doing what you do now to be able to check the work at the door and to not bring that home. And to realize [00:07:00] there's a boundary here. This is our family time. And, I definitely struggled with that, like I was so excited about the business and so excited and so the first four months or so were really hard for me to turn it off.

Like we're we have family dinner together that's very important to us. She'd started it and we, I kept it up actually. You were out to dinner last night and so it was just me and the kids and went around the table. What's your favorite part of the day? And they're so cute.

They rem they were like pretending like they were in school. They couldn't remember like separate that they weren't in school anymore. They're raising their hand 'cause they wanted go next. Which is so cute. But we have dinner at family, dinner time, the kids chores to clean up the table after, mommy cooks and kids clean.

So yeah, firehouse rules right there. That's great. Oh, it's great. It's great. It's the day I didn't have to do dishes anymore, so Nice. But anyway, so they do that and then after we have family time, we'll watch like a GT or we have some, show that we watch as a family and, and the kids really enjoy that. And it's our time together. And when we first bought [00:08:00] the business, I'm so excited about it. And so whatever, like I would bring my computer or bring my phone with me and I was doing whatever, like doing this on the website or updating this product listing or whatever, and it was like, okay, but like you have to turn it off at some point you have to.

You can't just work 24 7 and it's a good way to burn out honestly. And so I think I'm finally turning the corner on being a little bit better about, I was still like making jewelry while we were watching tv, but that's at least like mostly mindless. But yeah, but I've still had a better boundary with that.

But he has just seemed to not struggle with that. And so it's so beautiful. 'cause we're on vacation and I know he's incredibly busy. He practically works three full-time jobs and we go on vacation and it's not like he's missing from things like, I'm like, how do you do that? How do you keep all of this stuff running?

And still be so present. [00:09:00] So it's it's really cool. I think you could teach a masterclass on that or something. I don't know. It's pretty good. 

Jude: Yeah. Yeah. The key is the right team. You have to find the way to create teams around you that are really competent at their functions and then you're just managing those teams.

Anytime you are the doer in your business, you can't step away without. Continuing to do while you're away. And so I've found good balance in being able to manage. It hasn't always been that way in my career, though. I've had lots of different times whenever I'm the one doing the work. And then it's just about priority management in terms of, are we getting the things done that are urgent for today so that whenever I go home I have the ability to, be present for my family.

And then there's plenty of times that it's, 11 o'clock at night, I'm back at my desk or. Four o'clock in the morning, I'm back at my desk getting the work done. But that was a conscious decision. I'm putting the work away so I can be with my family and then, getting [00:10:00] back to it later.

Joshua Wilson: Yeah. When it comes to, I. Being an example for the kids, right? We have our priorities, God, family, business, showing them entrepreneurship and showing them building business and also they're students of their parents, right? So they're watching how you all interact. Maybe share an instance where you maybe had to redo something or maybe you, if you looked back, you could say, we could have done that better.

Not trying to put you guys on the spot here, but I think that they're, it's being a parent is hard. I've, I have three kids and they're always watching and I have to say, sorry I messed up a lot. So maybe in the world of deal maker, parent, husband, wife, like where do you think what would you do differently?

Jude: Oh, I want to hear your answer to this one. Yeah. 

Ashley: No, I don't know what's on the spot too much. I think. In relation to what I said about being so on fire and so excited about the business and being all in and devoting so much time and attention [00:11:00] to that almost to the detriment of everything else.

And it, it was hard to turn it off 'cause I was so excited and so passionate about it. So I think I would've gone back and, I don't know how I would've necessarily helped myself to be more grounded in no you need to stop, you need to go read that story instead of finishing this thing over here.

I think that's probably what I would've done, but I think, I don't think I have any regrets on. The discernment process and praying through it and thinking through all the different angles and seeing the ways the kids could be involved. And we're teaching them how to come and.

Fold boxes for mom and their payment is like a key chain, like you don't, you, you get to work, but like you're still, I'll pay you. But it's in kind and but then sometimes you don't like, you just this part of like chores in our family, it's just part of contributing to the family.

You've got [00:12:00] to, we all pitch in, we're all part of this family. So 

Jude: yeah, there's a lot that has to happen in a big family. Six kids, number seven on the way. Think of all the challenges that you have with one kid or two kids, and then just multiply that because there's a lot more.

Ashley: All the schedules and the Yeah.

Getting people places and every 

Jude: kid has activities, every kid has events and birthday parties and 

Ashley: shoes that you can never find 

Jude: and kids get sick and whatever else. When you have six kids, you're six times more likely to have one that's sick. And then whenever one gets sick, they pass it to the other five.

And you've got six sick kids at home. There's a lot of challenges there. And. If you're ordering your priorities and knowing that family comes first, yeah, it's really helpful, but it's also really easy to get overstimulated by all the different needs you have. All the needs coming at you from your business, all the needs coming at you from your kids, and then just all the other things that come at you in life.

And the easiest way to deal with that would be [00:13:00] outsourcing it. How do you get somebody else to take on childcare and take on running the errands and take on this and take on that? 

Ashley: Cleaning the house, 

Jude: cleaning the house. And there's some things that it makes a lot of sense. Oh, let's pay somebody to clean the house because we need a clean house, and none of us have time to do that.

When it comes to things about managing the family and our kids, you can't outsource those things and expect good results. And we have been very intentional about that, about what areas can we get help, what areas can we find ways to delegate and do things better, but what areas do we need to be the ones who are, actively responsible.

That's why family dinner is so important to us. You can't outsource that and expect to raise good kids. I drive my kids to school every morning and Ashley picks them up in the afternoons and, we spend that time together because it's very important that we have that one-on-one time with our kids.

If you aren't finding ways to put that priority in place, it's very easy to just let your busy schedule overwhelm it and then [00:14:00] suddenly somebody else is taking those really important moments 

Joshua Wilson: when it comes to husbands and wives out there, family members, maybe family owned businesses, right? What kind of things do you see in your business and mergers and acquisitions in your new business that maybe you've learned something that you wanna share with the other family owned businesses out there? Let's start with you, Jude. 

Jude: That's a great question. I've learned so many things along the way.

And it, it's funny 'cause I've had different stages in my career where I've learned different things and you start to feel like you're becoming a master at something and then. Like somebody moves the pieces on the chessboard a little bit and you realize oh no, actually that's a whole different game now.

Okay, now I need to learn some new things. And I actually really embrace that. I love something new that I've never done before. So I'm always looking for what's a new kind of deal that I've never done before, or what's a new kind of business practice I haven't done before? And then we can try something new.

And I think that's, you're 

Ashley: always reading books too. Yeah, always reading. 

Jude: I, I think I just love [00:15:00] learning and love, stretching our capabilities a little bit. And I think that's really important in business. Being willing to adapt and try new things. And I think that's where you really get ahead.

The other really important thing in business is being okay with all the risks. You have to be able to appreciate all the risks, understand the risks that you're taking, and then say, you know what? To heck with it, we're gonna do it anyway. And, I have those things come across my desk every single week where it's here's a big risk that's sitting in front of us.

We could pause what we're doing and wait and see if that risk can subside or, we can manage it or we just plow ahead, understanding the risk and go forward. And I think a lot of people fail in business because they're very risk averse and they see risks and they see challenges and they find ways to pull back and not plow ahead.

I think the really successful entrepreneurs that I've witnessed over the years, and I've worked for a lot of them over the [00:16:00] years as a lawyer and an advisor and just working with other folks in business, the common characteristic that I've witnessed so many times is they're able to prioritize those risks and understand them.

We did a big transaction last year. Very significant eight figure deal. And I understood that we were paying, because we had a great deal, 50 cents on the dollar for the value of what we were getting. And whenever you know that, and you can appreciate the value that you're bringing to the table in a transaction, it makes all those little 20, 30, $40,000 risks seem very insignificant.

And my team, on the other hand, is paid to worry about all those risks and bring 'em to my attention. And so I had several times that team members came in my office and said, we just, we can't do this deal. 'cause there's a, an $80,000 risk. That, if this happens, it could really be a bad situation for us.

But, as the leader I'm thinking and prioritizing my head, oh, that's a risk that I'm comfortable with [00:17:00] because I know the value that's in this transaction. And that can happen in any small business. You can understand the value of that new product line or the value of that new path that we're going down is six figures or seven figures if we get it right.

And all these little risks are very small by comparison to the result. And so you have to be comfortable plowing through and going ahead with it. 

Ashley: Yeah, I think something that you shared about a recent transaction that you had was. Family dynamics with the sellers and relationships there and.

You are very good at reading people, I think, and understanding what motivates people. And that makes you very good at what you do. And the fact that you've told me many times about deals have to die 10 times before they live. Like a lot of times it's oh, that that's it, any other person would give up.

And Jude's the person that you know. It goes to 300 banks to [00:18:00] get funding for something and they all say no, and he keeps going until he finds the, the five that say, okay. And then one that he lands on to say yes. And so he's just tenacious in that way. And stubborn in a good way. Perseverance to the end but you understood dynamics of, okay.

What does this person need for them to feel like they got the win? Because sometimes, there, there's just some things in play there. It's very difficult to navigate being in the same business. So I think that's something that works for us because I have my business, he has his business.

But. I can see how it's difficult whenever, like wife works for husband or something like that. I think there has to be some clear boundaries there. You have to stay in your lane. You have to know. Okay. And maybe, let's say the wife is working for the husband.

The husband owns the business. They don't necessarily own it together. She's maybe a little smaller role. He's gotta trust that if I'm gonna give you, this piece to be responsible for, i'm gonna trust that you're gonna do it, [00:19:00] and not second guess or overlook, over your shoulder that you're gonna get it done.

And so I think that would be what I would say about advice with people who, family owned business and they work together. It's challenging. 

Jude: I admire people that can work as husband and wife in the same business. Yeah. I've worked with a lot of companies over the years where that's the case.

Husband and wife run a company together and. It shocks me a little bit how people make it work, and they can manage to keep running things together. In a lot of cases, they have very separate functions and work in separate sides of the office, and they can make it work that way, but some of 'em just are in the heat of it every day.

And business is really hard when you don't have relationship dynamics with a husband and wife in the mix. It's even harder. Especially if you have, you know what Ashley was just talking about with a hierarchy where, you know, one of 'em is the leader of the business and the other one is, reporting to that person as the leader.

Oh my gosh. I think [00:20:00] about the level of accountability I expect from my team members and, if we had that kind of relationship in business I'd expect the same thing from my spouse. You had a relationship dynamic there. It's gonna make it really hard to separate and segregate those things in your mind and create those boundaries.

So I, I admire people who do it. We've never done that. I don't think I'd really want to try. 

Ashley: No. I don't either. That's okay. I'll just ask you for advice and stay in my lane. 

Joshua Wilson: So this is probably a really good, call to action. Ashley, tell us one more time where people could go to find more about you and your business.

Ashley: Sure. So they can go to pink salt riot.com. It's where we have all of our products. We have actually have a lot of free resources too which are really great. And you can find us on Instagram and TikTok at Pink Salt Riot. So yeah, love to get you connected and learn more about our mission to fight the lies and live in the truth.

Joshua Wilson: Cool. And for our [00:21:00] listeners out there, we wanna encourage you to reach out to our guests, say thanks for being on the show, and stay tuned for one of the next episodes where Jude will come in and get to share his story and his journey and the things that he's learned on this. We wanna put a, maybe even a call to action here.

If you're a family owned business that has that dynamic, we would love to hear from you and learn from you and share what you've learned. Having a husband, wife team or maybe brother, sister. Sister relationship within a business. Talk to us about what you've learned and how do you set the boundaries?

How do you set the expectations, the accountability? So you could just head over to the website or go to the show notes here and you could contact me directly. We do want to hear your story and maybe part of your, family business journey. Second, third generations even. We thank you guys for listening in, and we'll see you all on the next show.

Bye-bye.